The Hair Is Fleeing

So, what is it like to know that you are indeed losing your hair because of chemo?  Weird.  I suspected this was starting to happen to me Sunday.  My scalp itched more than usual.  I had tingles in my scalp, odd tingles.  On occasion there would be a hair on the loose – more often than usual.  Add to that the hair I was starting to find on my shower soap.

Monday my suspicions were confirmed.  If I ran my hands through my hair, I would end up with a few in my fingers.  If I lightly tugged, I got a few more.  If I ran a large-toothed comb through my hair, I got a few.  So, when I showered, I decided not to rub my hair – just get it wet.  Then I would not rub it dry, just pat it.  In the shower, I did tug a little bit on my hair . . . a little more came in the tug. 

I was right – I was losing my hair.

I have spent the past few days dealing with more and more shedding.  It reminds me of a dog shedding hair, as it seems to get on everything:  back of the chair, my shirts, bathroom sink, etc.  I sometimes go out on the deck just to fluff my hair.  At night I wear a cap to help keep my sleep area free from falling hair.

We are to go to Ohio this weekend, and I know that I do not want to be messing with this.  So, I am at a crossroads – when do I go for the buzz cut and switch to hats and a wig?  That’s easier said than done.

Yesterday I called my friend Becky, my support and advisor in these matters, as she had helped out my pal Val.  I told her my dilemma and where I am in all of this.  She understands my situation somewhat, as a result.  We decided that probably today will be the day – not sure when I will give her the call; but this is probably the day.

This has been a dreaded moment.  I had hopes I would be that odd statistic and not lose my hair.  To me, losing my hair makes it more apparent to everyone -- including people I do not know -- that I have cancer.  I am not comfortable with that.  I would prefer to keep that limited to my family and friends.

At least I have come to the point where I realize that I just have to deal with this.  I will.